4/8/2007 Freemantle WA Australia
Just had a reading from a clairvoyant lady called Emma. She thought I was 10 years younger than I am, she might not be able to see numbers very well… She said she could see the countries China in my future and New Zealand. The most important thing she said is that I should have more fun! Take a sabbatical and enjoy myself more. Get a certificate to teach English as a second language and get into some dancing classes to learn salsa, tango, R & R and Bolywood. She said do all the things you like regardless of what you were thought. Regardless what might be perceived right or wrong. I am having fun. Are there any regrets I have not gotten rid of? Do I regret not living life to the fullest and of holding back? Did I hold back? It is ok for me to be selfish and to enjoy life. Let’s see now if I can speed up the process and not wait a full year to become happy and more balanced. Western Australia used to be part of the Goddess, Emma said ,and now that is changing fast as they are emptying it and shipping it all out by mining industries. She thinks I came into this life to help my sister? Furthermore she sees I am not ready to have a man in my life and that when I finally will, the relationship will be very different to what I think it will be. (I create my own world, I create a happy world in which everyone is fulfilled, happy and an example of abundance.) I will stop dating K. and look for something more substantial. While I am writing this I am sitting in the Mussel-bar of a restaurant along the water drinking Babich (a white NZ wine, maybe that is the NZ the clairvoyant was talking about?) It is nice and  hot in the sun and a perfect breeze keeps it excellent to dine outside. I wonder how much of the sadness that Emma saw was her own, projected on me. She came here to WA to give up her life and be of service to her daughter. I will go and write some more affirmations. I especially like the sentence of Abraham (Hicks): “ you did not come into this environment to create through action. Instead, your action is meant to be a way in which you enjoy what you have created through thought. When you take the time to deliberately offer your thought, discovering the power of aligning the thoughts of your desires with the matching beliefs and expectations, the Law of Attraction will yield to you the results you are seeking.”
How do I see myself? Do I think I am the saviour? That I should suffer whilst others enjoy? It is ok and safe for me to enjoy life and do exactly what I want. That means spending my time alone or with other people, whichever I prefer at any given moment. I do not have to feel guilty when I say “No” or “Yes” to other people. I put all my dreams in positive affirmations as if they were already happening and feel exactly how it would feel if all my dreams were reality. If I am able to imagine it, it is not unrealistic! If from this space-time reality I have been able to create my desire, it implicates that the space-time reality has the resources to fulfil the same. All that is required is my VIBRATIONAL ALIGNMENT with my desire! “I have enough power to create anything that I can imagine. Removing myself from opposition is not necessary. Just focus on what you want, and by the power of your own clarity, you will be able to positively create under ANY circumstances.” (again Abraham / Hicks, I think it is “the Law of Attraction” I was reading at that time)
I ended that day with following thoughts:
It’s all good.
I like knowing that I can control how I feel
I am not worried about it
I always have enough money for whatever I want
I now understand that whatever I want is easily available to me
I have only to identify it and it comes to me
As long as you are seeing only “what is” you cannot grow beyond it. You must be allowed to see what you want to see if you will ever attract what you want to see. Attention to what-is only creates more of what-is

nothing beats the sea