Today I want to write my blog. It is kind of pressure I feel in the weekend. The most important thing to stay inspired is to enjoy my weekend and not to feel pressured to write. I need to stay in the now and not fret about the next moment. This is the only moment and allow for it to take shape. I am now allowing for the blog to come to me.
The Purpose of a Broken Heart
I saw a post on Facebook this morning about allowing for your heart to be broken. “The purpose of our heart is to be broken” it stated. I have lost count how many times I thought my heart was broken. It seems that each time it has grown back and ended up much bigger then it was before! Every crack made it softer and more accessible. Every crack allowed for more light to shine in and by doing that showed that even in the darkest corners there is nothing to fear. There were no monsters hiding in the darkness, the only monsters that I found are the ones that exist in my mind only. My imagination makes them up and hides them in places where I am too afraid to bring clarity. Once my mind is clear there are no more monsters. Every time I rid my mind of some believe that it thinks it needs to fearful of (a monster) I feel more free. Another limitation gone and a more light shining on the path in front of me. Every step I can feel that I am guided. Sometimes I stop and feel the heart cracking, I listen to the soundless sound that shouts in my internal ear. The mind becoming fix and protesting, “no! I resist, I do not want to feel this”. Instead of going with the flow I suddenly think it is a good idea to start paddling upstream and then I am surprised it is painful. At the other side of the pain is the salvation.
Once the river is crossed and all tears have been washed away there is real peace. No more fighting just allowing. Letting the pain be and see it disappear in the nothingness it came from. I can never ever feel that same pain again, just like I never ever see the same waterfal again. I start to align with the observer who is looking at an ever changing universe. The part in my that wants to align to all that it really is, at its core, I can start observing without getting lost in the images and the feelings that go with certain images. I no longer have to take it personally. The I is not longer separate from the observed. It becomes that what cannot be observed. Consciousness ever expanding, aware of all the contrast in the made up world.